Modern western mindfulness has followed a somewhat circuitous path to get to where it is today, but it probably wouldn't be an overreach to suggest that Jon Kabat-Zinn is the "father" of modern mindfulness. His mindfulness-based stress reduction (MBSR) program was among the first to utilize Buddhist teachings as part of a science-based health program. He may be partially responsible for the surge in scientific research into the benefits of meditation itself.

He also has a way with words, having authored a number of books on mindfulness going back 30 years. With such a wealth of content, there are plenty of nuggets of wisdom to be found among his pages. Here are the seven most important Jon Kabat-Zinn quotes.

"You can't stop the waves, but you can learn to surf."

This one goes right to number one as it's not only Kabat-Zinn's most famous saying, but it might also be the most helpful. In only 11 words, it exemplifies life itself and the consistent mistake we make in trying to deny or wish away new problems. We can't prevent obstacles from coming up in our lives, any more than we can settle the waves in the ocean. We can either find a method to help us navigate the waves or continue to fight against them with futility, hoping ineffectively that they might one day stop. The choice is clear. We must learn how to surf. The phrase has been memorialized in countless memes, but that doesn't make it any less true.

"Meditation is neither shutting things out nor off. It is seeing things clearly, and deliberately positioning yourself differently in relationship to them."

This is one of the first lessons given to newcomers to meditation and one of the hardest to absorb. We want those thoughts in our head to stop, especially in times of stress, or fear, or when we're trying to sleep. Those thoughts are what the waves in the first quote are referring to. You can't turn them off. The brain floats them into our consciousness the same way our lungs take in air and our hearts pump blood. But, understanding this and changing the relationship with our thoughts is one of the goals of consistent meditation. That intrusive thought ("You aren't good enough") will keep coming, but you can train yourself, through consistent mindfulness, to recognize that thought as just a thought, interpret it as the result of a negative mindset, and let it exist without enabling the thought to control your emotions. It isn't passive at all. It is, as Kabat-Zinn says, a deliberate way to reframe one's thoughts as distinct from one's identity.

"Patience is a form of wisdom. It demonstrates that we understand and accept the fact that sometimes things must unfold in their own time."

Becoming truly patient is a way of admitting that there is much we do not have control over in our lives. We are all, of course, anxious for the pandemic to finally be behind us, but it's hard to avoid the reality that it will play out in an unpredictable way with or without our participation. The world will turn in the coming months regardless of our individual intentions. Clashes in the streets will continue, people will continue to get sick, and a contentious election will be held. We may read the news obsessively all day in an attempt to wrap our heads around the world's complexities. But, ultimately, we need to understand there are forces out of our control. Patience is a virtue consistent meditation can help cultivate when we keep this in mind and accept it.

"We must be willing to encounter darkness and despair when they come up and face them, over and over again if need be, without running away or numbing ourselves in the thousands of ways we conjure up to avoid the unavoidable."

It's natural to not want to experience things that are unpleasant. But, we often have a tendency to confuse the things we can actually avoid with the things we can't. Kabat-Zinn is saying we need to take the acuteness out of emotional pain. It isn't something final and debilitating unless we treat it as such. We must confront the fact that "darkness and despair" will find us throughout our lives, that these are experiences we have lived through before and will live through again. We do more damage in attempting to avoid them than they do when they express themselves.

"Note that this journey is uniquely yours, no one else's. So the path has to be your own. You cannot imitate somebody else's journey and still be true to yourself. Are you prepared to honor your uniqueness in this way?"

Since we have so little control over life, we may get despondent and feel like we aren't special. But, in fact, the opposite is true. Our personal experiences are completely inimitable; they can never be experienced by another or accurately represented in any book or film. When we meditate, we may be feeling emotions that others can empathize with, but the experience is uniquely our own. This can be helpful in both recognizing how our minds and bodies are connected and settling negative emotions like jealousy or bitterness.

In Los Angeles, where I live, there are tens of thousands of people struggling to find success in a ruthless and unforgiving entertainment industry. People who work hard for decades and see no results will witness others passing them by. Expecting our experience to be like theirs isn't only unhelpful, it can be destructive. A writer and comedian I greatly respect once told me: "Keep your eyes on your own paper." This is vital with our mental health and mindsets as it is in our careers.

"You make problem, you have problem."

Similar to "you can't stop the waves," this quote emphasizes the inevitability of new obstacles and challenges in our lives. It takes it once step farther, though, and suggests that many of those waves we encounter are either of our own design or are not really obstacles at all. For example, for a surfer, a wave is not a problem to be overcome, but a feature of the activity. One can't physically surf without them. It is our minds that perpetually see the waves as obstacles needing to be overcome (by surfing, or a boat, or staying out of the ocean altogether).

But, what if we considered the waves a natural part of life? Something that could lead us to do things we wouldn't otherwise have done? It can be difficult to see challenges as features instead of bugs. But, if we can learn to give ourselves perspective through meditation, even if it comes through addressing only small challenges, we will have fewer problems, because we will be making fewer problems.

"So, in meditation practice, the best way to get somewhere is to let go of trying to get anywhere at all" and "See for yourself whether letting go when a part of you really wants to hold on doesn't bring a deeper satisfaction than clinging."

The above quotes, like several in this list, can be found in Kabat-Zinn's book "Wherever You Go, There You Are." (A few others are from "Full Catastrophe Living.") The theme of "letting go" comes up regularly throughout Kabat-Zinn's work, suggesting how difficult it can be to put into practice. Often, we're able to let our minds rest and follow our breath during meditation, letting thoughts come and go as they do. As soon as we're done with the practice, however, we're back at it, clinging to our pain, our anxieties, and our unceasing need to control things around us. Kabat-Zinn posits that if, just if, we are able to let go and live in a state of focused quietude, we'll realize it's a much easier and more effective state to be in. We might achieve what we've always wanted to achieve through our meditation practice if we simply let go and stop trying to achieve quite so much.